Okay, I fell down a rabbit hole that started with my coffee maker dying and ended with me accidentally becoming a warranty researcher.
It began with the realization that every appliance I've bought in the past three years has broken exactly one year after purchase. Every. Single. One.
So I made a dramatic vow to myself: Never again would I spend real money on something that couldn't back itself up with an actual promise. (unless it was from a small business)
What followed was 2 am research sessions, spreadsheets I'm embarrassed to admit I enjoyed making, and phone calls to customer service reps who probably think I'm unhinged.
The result:
Lifetime Warranty Deals
The crème de la crème, if you will.
Briggs & Riley Luggage: Covered even if the airline crushes it; lifetime, no receipt needed
Osprey Packs: Almighty Guarantee for life; Farpoint 40 does Europe, thru-hikes, anything
GR1 Backpack: Lifetime repair/rebuild via SCARS; indestructible
Darn Tough Socks: Vermont-made merino; when they wear out, you get new socks forever
Fiskars offers a lifetime warranty on knives, gardening shears, saws, and craft blades for defects in materials and workmanship.
Medley: Lifetime warranty on all frames, internal springs, and wood structural elements.